scatter's blog

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scatter's blog https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/blog/scatter en A Story About The Power of Stories... https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/a-story-about-power-stories My buddy Eric recorded me talking on KPFA last year and I just rediscovered it. If you have a few minutes to listen to me talk about the stuff in my head, check it out:<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/a-story-about-power-stories" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/a-story-about-power-stories#comments Thu, 01 Mar 2012 06:03:59 +0000 scatter 19287 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org Icarus Mission Statement Translated Into Hebrew! https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/icarus-mission-statement-translated-hebrew So last month I traveled to Israel and the West Bank for the first time in my life and met so many inspiring people and got my mind blown and heart broken open. Right before I got on the plane to fly home I facilitated an Icarus Project style radical mental health discussion at the anarchist community center <a href="http://rogatka.me/">Rogatka</a> in Tel Aviv. There were about 20 people there, with a number of folks from <a href="http://www.awalls.org/">Anarchists Against the Wall,</a> some of whom I'd met at a protest in <a href="http://nabisalehsolidarity.wordpress.com/">Nabi Saleh</a> a few days before amidst the tear gas and <a href="http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x72yun_israeli-skunk-spray-weapon_news">skunk water canons</a>.(!?!) We talked about madness and language and collective trauma and watched <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qgAaIBlq-cs">Crooked Beauty</a> and it felt like it could be the beginning of some important new discussions about mental health in the radical activist community in Israel.<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/icarus-mission-statement-translated-hebrew" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/icarus-mission-statement-translated-hebrew#comments Thu, 16 Feb 2012 03:58:38 +0000 scatter 19271 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org Sascha's European Tour Interview in Stockholm, 2011 https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/Sascha-European-Interview-2011 I co-founded the Icarus Project with my best friend Jacks McNamara in 2002 and it initially began as a website for people to be able to find one another and raise the level of dialog around experiences in the mental health system. As it grew it became a magnet for the brilliant and mad.<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/Sascha-European-Interview-2011" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/Sascha-European-Interview-2011#comments Tue, 20 Dec 2011 20:39:29 +0000 scatter 19243 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org Reseeding the Icarus Bunchgrass https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/reseeding-icarus-bunchgrass Reseeding the Icarus Bunchgrass  The same way bunchgrass sometimes dies out in the middle and continues growing healthily while gaining new ground, in the last couple years the Icarus Project has lost its central organizing body while continuing to live and grow in many directions. In this coming year what we aim to do is reseed the Icarus bunchgrass -- redevelop enough of a core organizing body that we can make decisions and continue to grow and develop and be a force for change in the world.  We want to attract a wide and diverse variety of Icarus allies and former members, provide a new platform for community conversations with our upgraded website,  create material that can be discussed in our local groups, sort through and highlight some of the amazing discussions that have happened in our forums over the past 10 years, raise some more money, and--very importantly--begin to develop a base of people from which to develop a new decision-making body for the organization.<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/reseeding-icarus-bunchgrass" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/reseeding-icarus-bunchgrass#comments Tue, 20 Dec 2011 20:03:51 +0000 scatter 19241 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org The Icarus Project: A Counter Narrative for Psychic Diversity https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/icarus-project-a-counter-narrative-psychic-diversity (This is a paper I wrote for Prescott College with Dr. Brad Lewis as my mentor. It's still rough in a couple place but at some point soon we're going to clean it up and submit it to a journal.)Abstract: Over the past nine years, I've had the good fortune of collaborating with others to create a project which challenges and complicates the dominant biopsychiatric model of mental illness. The Icarus Project, founded in 2002, not only critiqued the terms and practices central to the biopsychiatric model, it also inspired a new language and a new community for people struggling with mental health issues in the 21st century. The Icarus Project believes that humans are meaning makers, that meaning is created through developing intrapersonal and interpersonal narratives, and that these narratives are important sites of creativity, struggle, and growth. The Icarus counter narrative and the community it fostered has been invaluable for people around the world dealing with psychic diversity—particularly for people alienated by mainstream approaches. But, despite the numbers of people who have been inspired by this approach, the historical background of the Icarus Project is hard to find. It exists primarily in oral history, newspaper articles, unpublished or self-published Icarus documents, and in internet discussion forums. As the cofounder of the Icarus Project, I use this article to make that history, or at least my understanding of it, more widely available.<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/icarus-project-a-counter-narrative-psychic-diversity" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/icarus-project-a-counter-narrative-psychic-diversity#comments Sun, 18 Dec 2011 05:25:03 +0000 scatter 19234 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org “THE OPPOSITE OF BEING DEPRESSED” an interview with Sascha Altman DuBrul https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/interview-with-sascha%20 <img alt="" src="http://cl.ly/0y0Z1J021J0A082q241p/sascha%20in%20berlin.jpg" width="250px" />At this point I’ve read my history. I learned about the European Enlightenment, made sense of where the philosophies of the sub-culture I came from drew their historical understanding. Marxism is in some ways very Biblical. There are a lot of things about Buddhist philosophy that are pretty punk. All of these things eventually overlap. I don’t think there’s any future in de-spiritualized communities, or cultures. You can look at the Left in the United States, and how much better the religious right is at organizing, because they have God on their side. Compare that to my mom in her apartment in Manhattan, reading the Nation magazine. For myself, it came from having what I didn’t realize at the time were spiritual experiences– in the punk scene, with the anarchists... <a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/interview-with-sascha%20" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/interview-with-sascha%20#comments Sun, 18 Dec 2011 01:19:53 +0000 scatter 19232 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org Mad Adventures and the Imagined Communities of Icarus https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/community/mad-adventures-and-imagined-communities-icarus <h2 class="entry-title"><a href="http://imaginedcommunities.wordpress.com/2011/06/17/why-am-i-calling-this-blog-imagined-communities/" rel="bookmark"></a></h2><a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/community/mad-adventures-and-imagined-communities-icarus" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/community/mad-adventures-and-imagined-communities-icarus#comments community history icarus organizational rants Tue, 13 Dec 2011 16:43:23 +0000 scatter 19230 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org At the Intersection of Counterculture, Spirituality, and Social Justice (Icarus at Esalen) https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/intersection-counterculture-spirituality-and-social-justice  I'm spending the month of June co-teaching a seminar at Esalen on the history of the Human Potential Movement and what lessons and tools might be useful for a modern day radical mental health movement. That's not actually the full description of what the course is about, but that's the focus I'm bringing to the table from my years working with the Icarus Project and being involved in radical anti-capitalist organizing...<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/intersection-counterculture-spirituality-and-social-justice" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/intersection-counterculture-spirituality-and-social-justice#comments Wed, 19 May 2010 18:41:02 +0000 scatter 18667 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org Wings of Desire/New Year's Resolution https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/wingsdesirenewyearsresolution just a scratch of a journal entry, a reminder of a glimpse into the other realm.<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/wingsdesirenewyearsresolution" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/wingsdesirenewyearsresolution#comments Mon, 04 Jan 2010 06:50:46 +0000 scatter 18314 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org Ashram Dreams https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/ashramdreams Here, I have something for you: it’s an old box of stories I’ve been carrying around for way too long. I want you to have them, it’s time for me to let go. It’s time for me to move on. If you see glimmers of yourself in them it’s because you actually wrote them years ago and told me to hang onto them for you and wait till the right time. Well the time is now. Can you feel the hairs on the back of your neck standing up like that cat that just walked by? Are you ready to take this to the next level? Step into the Present and lets see what we can do…<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/ashramdreams" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/ashramdreams#comments Thu, 14 May 2009 02:37:39 +0000 scatter 17550 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org This is a Bridge Between the Past and the Future https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/this-a-bridge-between-past-and-future and it's rough. it's all posts on the icarus discussion forums from the winter and the spring. i'll come back and format it better, maybe edit some.<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/this-a-bridge-between-past-and-future" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/this-a-bridge-between-past-and-future#comments Fri, 17 Oct 2008 03:46:14 +0000 scatter 16707 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org Spiral Bound https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/spiral-bound it's like some kind of spiral dance,  a manic-depressive schitzo-coaster spiral dance of fate. it's familiar, like i've been here before in a different life and i already know the path. there are a lot of us dancing to our mad music, and we're figuring out how to be together and work together and live together in ways that have never been tried. this place really is like a bridge between worlds where our stories connect to one another. i feel you all out there from this little kitchen in brooklyn, at least i imagine i do. whenever i'm about to finish a little piece of writing like this it always somehow feels like i'm connected into the collective consciousness and i'm moving upwards. like i'm spiral bound, connected to people i've known in the past and places that we've been too before.<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/spiral-bound" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/spiral-bound#comments Fri, 26 Sep 2008 06:49:08 +0000 scatter 16656 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org The Global Intifada https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/the-global-intifada As a mad activist with an analysis of collective trauma, it seems painfully clear to me that my people, who have been so oppressed throughout history and most recently under Nazi Germany, are acting out the role of oppressor in the same way a traumatized individual will lash out and perpetuate the cycle of violence with the people in their life. In the same way that I’ve come to believe that the hardest and scariest parts of ourselves hold the secret keys to our problems, I think that politically the Israeli-Palestinian conflict is the equivalent of our darkest fears and secrets. It’s as ugly as it gets and we have to stare it in the face and take action or else in the long run it will destroy anything good and just we are working towards.<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/the-global-intifada" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/the-global-intifada#comments campus organizing race & class Thu, 29 May 2008 04:02:10 +0000 scatter 16417 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org Up From the Underground: A New Era For the Icarus Project https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/up-from-the-underground For years the tension of being a bunch of radical anarchists trying to influence the dominant culture while staying out of it ourselves has been one of the most interesting aspects of working on the Icarus Project. Early on we developed a <a href="../../../../../../dandelion-visions+">metaphor</a> to talk about our role in the movement, that of the dandelion pulling the good stuff up from the underground with its deep taproots, influencing the mainstream culture to evolve the way soil structure builds and changes, slowly over time. <a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/up-from-the-underground" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/up-from-the-underground#comments Fri, 16 May 2008 14:19:01 +0000 scatter 16402 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org The Spirit of the Times https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/the-spirit-of-the-times What if it turned out that our so called Rational language is actually a complex set of linguistic traps that cleverly veils the power relationships of a Spirit Realm which is happening around us all the time: buzzing on our computer screens, pumping in our blood, and growing out of the ground we walk on everyday?<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/the-spirit-of-the-times" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/the-spirit-of-the-times#comments Thu, 15 May 2008 15:39:40 +0000 scatter 16395 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org The Audacity of the Anarchists https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/%5Bcatpath%5D/the-audacity-of-the-anarchists from where i'm standing it feels like such a mystical riddle, no one could have written a more interesting story: the cold war that became the war against terror nightmare puppet show, the neoconservatives are old trotskyists, the oppressed become the oppressors, the blacks and the jews actually have to figure out how to talk to one another about what went down in the late 60's, all the political prisoners and ghosts from put down rebellions waiting in the sidelines, a generation of mad kids struggling with monocult voodoo labels and psych drugs communicating with lightspeed technology... <a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/%5Bcatpath%5D/the-audacity-of-the-anarchists" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/%5Bcatpath%5D/the-audacity-of-the-anarchists#comments Tue, 13 May 2008 03:01:05 +0000 scatter 16393 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org The Audacity of the Anarchists https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/node/16392 from where i'm standing it feels like such a mystical riddle, no one could have written a more interesting story: the cold war that became the war against terror nightmare puppet show, the neoconservatives are old trotskyists, the oppressed become the oppressors, the blacks and the jews actually have to figure out how to talk to one another about what went down in the late 60's, all the political prisoners and ghosts from put down rebellions waiting in the sidelines, a generation of mad kids struggling with monocult voodoo labels and psych drugs communicating with lightspeed technology... <a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/node/16392" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/node/16392#comments Tue, 13 May 2008 02:48:27 +0000 scatter 16392 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org my faith in the Mad Ones https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/mad-ones i don't know about you all but i know i want to be a part of a movement that has language to talk about power and class and race and gender without devolving into fragmenting identity politics, a movement that is full of love and actually prioritizes supporting the people in it, a movement that can collectively learn from its mistakes, a movement that knows its history and tells the stories publicly and loudly and beautifully, a movement that prioritizes community health and community support in ways that capture people's imaginations and in ways the state and corporations will never be able to, and a movement that has mad respect for wild dreams and true diversity and the ones who--by their very nature--don't fit into neat boxes and never will under any system. a movement of the people that respects the freaks and wild ones. <a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/mad-ones" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/mad-ones#comments Mon, 07 Apr 2008 09:14:14 +0000 scatter 16345 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org My Fireball of a Dad Died 20 Years Ago https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/paul-dubrul-obituary and this is the obituary two of his best friends wrote for him.<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/paul-dubrul-obituary" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/paul-dubrul-obituary#comments Tue, 04 Dec 2007 18:08:46 +0000 scatter 16192 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org Marking Trails to the Other Side https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/marking-trails-to-the-other-side The contours of your mental terrain are complex and jagged, carved from a life of adventure and pain and love without regrets. Scars from climbing over barbed wire fences between the borders of depression and mania and getting your heart broken over and over and patching it back together with pieces from everywhere.<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/marking-trails-to-the-other-side" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/marking-trails-to-the-other-side#comments Wed, 11 Jul 2007 22:48:13 +0000 scatter 14732 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org Gelfling Mind Meld https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/gelfling-mind-meld i think these stories, these old myths of lost tribes and fairies and demons and wizards and magic -- i think we all have these stories embedded in our subconscious, they've evolved the same way our organs have evolved: very slowly, over time. the dominant culture knows how to play on those stories and trigger feelings in us that we don't even know we have. but different messages are getting through to different people. the fascist dream is of mass control but it can never really work like that for too long.<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/gelfling-mind-meld" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/gelfling-mind-meld#comments Thu, 14 Jun 2007 20:40:49 +0000 scatter 14656 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org Tuned to the Hallucination Station https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/tuned-to-the-hallucination-station the same traits that make people like me predisposed to travel through dimensions are the ones that get us tormented by voices and ghosts and locked up and stuck on haldol. but i think i'm up for the challenge.<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/tuned-to-the-hallucination-station" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/tuned-to-the-hallucination-station#comments Wed, 11 Apr 2007 02:53:54 +0000 scatter 14235 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org A Shaman's Path in the 21st Century https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/a-shamans-path-in-the-21st-century Sky was the first healer person I ever worked with who had the ability to give me practical frameworks for thinking about the complex things I struggle with that the mainstream psych world only knows to call "psychosis." By acknowledging that I had "inner voices" that not only talk to me but talk amongst each other, she allowed a huge and incredibly helpful awareness shift to take place in my consciousness. She introduced me to a whole new fascinating vocabulary full of things like "tracking and journeying through dimensions", "traveling between worlds safely" and the performing of "soul retrievals."<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/a-shamans-path-in-the-21st-century" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/a-shamans-path-in-the-21st-century#comments Tue, 10 Apr 2007 05:08:07 +0000 scatter 14232 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org Death to Myspace...Long Live The Icarus Project https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/death-to-myspace%20 has anyone ever seen the movie videodrome? if it's not my favorite movie, it's probably the one that has had the most long term effect on my subconscious. it's about this cable tv station that ends up broadcasting signals which make tumors grow in people's brains and controls their thoughts. corporate mind control takeover, sexy 'blondie' era debbie harry s/m scenes, televisions talking directly to you and telling you to kill people, pretty grim and lovely and fascinating.<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/death-to-myspace%20" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/death-to-myspace%20#comments Thu, 22 Mar 2007 22:39:22 +0000 scatter 13468 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org half-cyborg telepathy and screaming manic at the moon https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/half-cyborg-telepathy-and-screaming-manic-at-the-moon Building a map for myself in the unconscious realm. clues and symbols to look out for, markers in the mirrored hallways. all those characters running around in there. the consentual reality but what does that mean? who's paying for it to stay like this? shapeshifting magicians or the people that hire their services?<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/half-cyborg-telepathy-and-screaming-manic-at-the-moon" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/half-cyborg-telepathy-and-screaming-manic-at-the-moon#comments Tue, 20 Mar 2007 17:38:17 +0000 scatter 13459 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org swirling, fractalized ironically self-similar life report https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/swirling-fractalized-ironically-self-similar-life-report There are so many hidden contradictory and melding layers inside my brain, and I get so caught up in the hectic immediacy of my life (like a shell I build around myself out of ocean salt and little bits of sand and sea glass) that I forget I'm constructing this swirling, fractalized ironically self-similar life around myself which just mimmics the life forces flowing around me and inevitably gets exponentially more interesting at the lithium carbonate in my blood dips below .5.<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/swirling-fractalized-ironically-self-similar-life-report" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/swirling-fractalized-ironically-self-similar-life-report#comments Tue, 20 Mar 2007 04:18:21 +0000 scatter 13458 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org A Choking Victim Christmas https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/a-choking-victim-christmas <div id="blip_movie_content_9228"><a onclick="play_blip_movie_9228(); return false;" href="http://blip.tv/file/get/Teamspider-CHOKINGVICTIM500ChannelsLiveOnTeamSpiderTelevision175.flv"><img border="0" </a></div><a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/a-choking-victim-christmas" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/a-choking-victim-christmas#comments Sun, 24 Dec 2006 15:07:25 +0000 scatter 13081 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org Mutant Superpowers and Lithium Pills https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/mutant-superpowers-and-lithium-pills In some ways what you hold in your hands is my perspective as one of the founding members working with a young radical organization in its first year on the ground in New York City. I think it's an important document for that reason because it gives a sense of what we were doing at the beginning and the spirit in which we were doing it. Icarus is rapidly (and thankfully) branching out way beyond its founders into new directions and I think it's important to record the history as it happens.<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/mutant-superpowers-and-lithium-pills" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/mutant-superpowers-and-lithium-pills#comments Thu, 07 Dec 2006 18:23:40 +0000 scatter 13000 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org The 'Fuck the Man' Option -- Remembering My Buddy Eric Ng https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/the-fuck-the-man-option-remembering-my-buddy-eric-ng This morning I checked my email and found out that Eric was struck and killed by a drunk driver on that bike path by the West Side Highway on Friday night. Just like that. He was 22 years old and was working as a schoolteacher in Brooklyn. Some drunk asshole in a BMW took our friend's life on that same bike path we all ride on all the time. It could have been any of us riding our bicycle on a Friday night. <a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/the-fuck-the-man-option-remembering-my-buddy-eric-ng" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/the-fuck-the-man-option-remembering-my-buddy-eric-ng#comments Fri, 01 Dec 2006 18:07:41 +0000 scatter 12999 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org brief moment captured in time https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/brief-moment-captured-in-time hey i'm sitting next to ashley and we just watched this crazy purple and pink sunset from her bedroom window and i'm taking the plunge andposting on this new fangled blog software.<a href="https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/brief-moment-captured-in-time" target="_blank">read more</a> https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org/brief-moment-captured-in-time#comments Wed, 22 Nov 2006 22:14:31 +0000 scatter 12941 at https://site.icarusprojectarchive.org