Each day I am losing a little bit of my soul to the abyss that is growing in me. I have been regrouping in the abyss, but finding stairs, gear, or anything has become impossible. I am down, and I don’t know where. I can’t see where I am, and I don’t know where the light went. I have fallen. I am light, I am afraid, I am at peace. How do I find a light in this abyss? When will I come back up? Is anyone there? Please, I need help, but to scared to ask. I don’t feel any warmth left in me. I am cold; the darkness is cold. I don’t know if this will be the last time I drop down or even if I will just recycle back. I just lose more to the darkness each descent, and I am forgetting what it is like to be in the light. The light is a foreign entity to me now. I can remember how if felt to be happy, and what it felt like to be excited; I can remember nothing. I am becoming apart of the nothingness… I drift. I become the darkness, the shallowness, the abyss. I don’t find a latter, I don’t look no more, I just wait for the end; hopefully. I have no hope, no love, no care; I feel nothing. I don’t hear anyone anymore. I stop looking for help, I stop wondering if I will ever been helped or loved once again.

            The ice beginnings to slowly melt off my lifeless body; I start to feel little by little over again. I am feeling reborn. I am seeing life again. I see the light once again; hope is rejuvenated. I feel the warmth of the grass once again; beautiful. The air is so clean and so soft. I love being here; I only wish I could stay. Everyone is here; I can see and feel their touch; beautiful. I am feeling so good, so high, and so insensible; I can take on the world. I will stay like this, and there is nothing the abyss can do about it. I will stand tall, and be tall. I will never go down, I will only go higher and higher, and there is no way back down. I will forget my map, forget the abyss, for get everything from before. I will never go back; never. There is nothing you can do to me that will stop me. I am higher and higher. I am on the top of the world and the view is beautiful and invigorating. I can never fall; I am insensible to all things, even if you all don’t like it.

            Something is wrong with this high. I am too high; I want to be further down. I am terrified of heights. I don’t want to fall from up here; I should descend back down for a better feeling. I will only walk down a little; just enough to feel the beauty once again. I crave to be apart of the beauty, the life, the love, and the people. It is so beautiful down there. I can feel the normal again; beautiful. I feel perfect here once again. I am happy. I am balanced. I am at peace. I don’t see any need to forget this love. It is so beautiful and I feel love once again. I am loved, I can feel love, and I see love.

            I feel the ground under me. I become connected to it. We are one with each other. I see how it shifts, moves, and support me. It is growing weak. It can’t hold me forever. This beautiful ground loves me, cares for me, and wants the best for me, but warns it can’t care for me forever. I shift my weight, I lose weight, I run to other ground, but the ground’s strength is weaker everywhere. What did I do wrong? This all feels familiar to me, this place, and this shift. I feel the ground moving more and more each minute; it can’t hold me no longer. I am scared; help me before I fall, before I return back. I can feel myself slowing falling back into… the abyss once again.