Hey-

I am knew to this sight and newly diagnosed with bipolar, though im pretty sure i have had it for years, as early as 4 years only. (had panick attacks and depression starting then, doctor documented)

i really dont like medication and these meds in particular (anti-depressants and mood stabilzers) scare me.

I have struggled with an eating disorder since i was around 9 years old and the idea that they cause weight gain has led me to stop medications, three times now. Lexapro i started gaining weight and that caused me to get anxious and depressed right away... so i stopped it. (under doctors review though). Recently i was on Prestique, and that did not help me at all, my depression went away for about two weeks and then it came back full force.

i dont know that i have ever had "mania" persay... my anxiety rushes etc can be hyperactive, but never had delusions or halluciations or moments of granduer.

now they have my on lamectil 25mg for 3 weeks then up to 75mg...

i read read about it and it worries me.,.. one with the rash and two people have written on here that they have gained a lot of weight.

i know it sounds ridiculous that a person would risk feeling unsuicidal, because they cant imagine getting fat... but its true.

any advice? do u guys find this to be true about lamectial?

how do others deal with this constant combat?

thanks.,...

in lue with the photo:

Body- E SEpulveda

With every passing moment you crafted my thought... shaped my main frame...

so i crave you...i need you...

my sanity... my heart, body and soul... body...

losing my soul...

body...my body... our body...

losing my heart