This is a piece of a letter I wrote about my experiences while I was in a red state for two weeks visiting my non-mad partner's dying grandfather.

...

Both fortunately and unfortunately, My partner's grandfather died the last day of our visit here, after she said goodbye to him. He was ready to go after almost a year of fighting lung cancer, had said his goodbyes and put his affairs in order, and was not happy that things were dragging on, so as far as we mere mortals around him could tell, that seemed good.

I'm glad we could be here to be with him and be supportive. He didn't want to be in a hospital, so his wife took care of him at home. We visited everyday (and overnight) so that his wife and his daughter could alternately get breaks, sleep, and make all the arrangements necessary. It was pretty draining (and sometimes infuriating, as when I was introduced as friend) but I'm glad I could help.

The weird/interesting part was when I woke up at 5:30am Thursday with this clearly formed idea that instead of taking my partner to the airport in a few hours, we needed to stay here. So we changed our plans to drive home Friday. He died that afternoon, so if we'd been driving home, we would have gotten the call and had to turn around and drive all the way back for the funeral. I guess I was tuned in to something....

My partner is doing fine. She's said her goodbyes, feels good about our time here, glad we came, and fascinated by the connections between caring for our friend's newborn and caring for her dying grandfather. The similarities are remarkable where the beginnings and ends of life overlap. It's one thing to believe in the connections, another to see how they actually manifest physically.

...

After I wrote this some rough shit went down with my partner's family the night before the funeral. It seems they blame me for converting their beloved daughter into a dyke and thus damning her immortal soul to the fires of hell....