I met an old friend on the beach today.  He was on the other end of the telephone when I was in a sort of manic episode.  I felt embarassed and overwhelmed by myself and by the magnitude of the ocean.  I thought of Spain and Pau and all the other places that I've put my feet into the same water.  It really could be the same water anywhere you go.  I don't like the idea that all the water is dirty and cyclic.  i wish it was new everytime.  that's why i prefer springs to oceans. 

My friend has a recording of me on the telephone.  I may never want to hear it.  I may weep or feel terrible.  It makes me uncomfortable that it even exists but I suppose it goes to show that everything you say can potentially make an impression on another.  Sure, there are little things that people have said to me that have stuck even though they were never intended to.  It makes me nervous to think of all the things I've said to people that have stuck with them even though I don't even rememeber saying it.  Ahhh recording is such a devil.