Anything goes?  Unsure because i have lived a "safe" life since recovery in that little divergence into creativity and all that surrounds it.  I have known the way out way of art and it's "cult-like" affect upon the psyche of a vulnerable person but I am determined to integrate the responsible and ordered way of life with the haphazard which is what i lean towards.  It is not a bad life but everyone seems to think it is just pitiful.  What is sad?  I'm serious, what is sadness anyway?  What i mean is that I am trusting you and this computer and even amongst the sanest of times I still must remind myself to trust. My therapist suggested this site when i talked with her and I am hoping to find a way to let myself go creatively and thoroughly enjoy my art without becoming obsessive and manic.  Maybe there is not such a thing???  Anyway, i am rambling...  I think I am seeking perfection and a stereotype that is one in which I am somewhat forced into thinking about.  In other words, MY parent, boyfriend, friends, etc. would and have thought I was out of control at times when I was just being creative.- It's like being too drunk to drive or something|!!!  Anyway, I am tired of being taken care of at times.