I am not eduardo_2
Submitted by eduardo_2 on Tue, 08/12/2008 - 5:54pmI am the original Eduardo, but my login clocked out because I don't come to the site anymore and so who needs a password anyway.
I don't come to the site because I do not feel comfortable at the site.
Do not ask me why. Someone else will probably feel free to share their opinion about it anyway.
I believe in the principles of: a living wage and architectural transparency
I look here for neither
Nor do I come here to seek approval
Nor do I come here to stir shit up
Nor do I believe I am an angel of world peace or that anyone else here has the answer
I've got a bipolar diagnosis, that is why I came to this site to begin with
I do not believe there is such a thing as 'good' bipolar and 'bad' bipolar
I have deep concerns about the tyranny of the majority
I am nonetheless not terminally unique
Nor do I believe that everybody ought to be able to get along on day one and if that doesn't work out that means the rules need changing
Nor do I think sitting around online all day is healthy for me
I do not become blind and ignorant to injustice when it is veiled in sweet talk or layers of victimology
I do not mistake passionate or vehement expression for violence
That I do not seek to be first on the totem pole does not mean I accept I must always be the very last
I do not post this reintroduction because I wish to bait people
I am not suggestible to betraying people who are actually being betrayed to me
If you feel a need to respond to this post, sit down with an egg timer first, please. You might find the urge will pass.
I am not a second version of myself. I am not renewed, revived, cured, repentant, recovered, or anything else. I am the same person I have always been. I have the same flaws and the same good aspects.
There are many posts on this site by eduardo for those who have never read one at all before. I have no idea what any of them say anymore. Please note, eduardo material of various sorts has also sometimes been deleted from this site, not necessarily exclusively out of objection but also over the course of site renovations.
This post does not promote candidacies, measures, or movements or ideologies, nor is it designed to tell people how to live or what to do
In the Tarot, the sword suit represents intellect, spirit, decisive intuition, air. Yes, there are three other suits and an entire Major Arcana of figures and other symbols. But that all things need not be swords need not suggest that all things must be cups, or that coins, also known as pentacles, are rooted in evil or the cause of it. It might bring up 'undue hilarity' to now claim that as a 'mad person', I do not play with a full deck. However, the deck is full, the cards are there. I may in fact not be out of my mind at all, I may simply on occasion be unable to cope with my sanity.
I'm sure I lost a few readers right there.
Boredom will always out.
I need to sign off now.
e
hey i just love you e! this
hey i just love you e!
this made me think of anais nin today (who i also adore) when she said something like: we don't see things as they are -- we see things as we are.
anais nin
I had actually gotten quite good at seeing things as they are, and not as I am, but in bad weather I try to to default to only speaking for myself.
Anais Nin: I was reading a few of her novels several years ago & my mom noticed and said, "Anais Nin! What are you reading her for? She's a galloping heterosexual!" Winston says Nin lived near CalArts when he was a student there and used to sometimes come to speak to them or just hang around, cutting a truly eccentric and intimidating figure. He does a hilarious impersonation of her in an old early 80's video. She's a great writer, one cannot argue with her talent; I am fully resistant, however, to reading the diaries or getting caught up in who she might otherwise be. Too scary.
I have to get back to my recovery program, which involves not reacting to further traumatic incitements. Writing the paper was trauma enough, sent me back 20 years worth of personal growth & if you knew what was in it you'd see exactly why I am absolutely unable to discuss certain things right now, so....I'm going to the pool and I'm going to pay my bills and that is all I can handle today. I started to write you an email this morning, made myself late, saved it as a draft, and now have to just drop it for the present. My brain hurts too much. Lovely to hear your voice,
e
Si il ya des homophones autour de moi je n'en suis pas consciente.----Catherine Deneuve