I have a fast brain disorder. This is so freakin' true. Tonight I had three main things I wanted to accomplish for work. Initially I felt like it was going to take a lot of motivation on my part and secretly I was just going to be happy with doing one or two of the three.

Then my roommate asked me to go over some therapy concepts with her (she is a music therapist and I am a behavioral therapist and she wanted to talk about some of the behavior therapy stuff) and so I had some powerpoints she could look at that I made up for trainings. So while she had my computer looking at them and reading, I had my other work to do. Somehow, between reading over the powerpoints myself, stopping and explaining various points and addressing questions, I also managed to finish my three tasks- one was coding some stuff from an assessment, one was writing up daily notes on my clients for the day, plus reviewing a client's programming and the final one was looking through this curriculum guide to get some ideas for a few programs for a kiddo. I got all of it done and then some.

My mind just jumped into this mode where it worked better when I had to simultaneously process the stuff I was going over with my roommate while going through the paperwork shit I had to do. And somehow, my brain worked better while I was doing both than if I had done them in isolation. I think that's cool. I can't always multi task, but I seem to be able to multi task with work related stuff better than anything.

So I love my fast brain disorder. I think this is a strength and while it could be odd and be potentially self destructive....I use it for good lol.

A secondary thought I had tonight...I think Risperadol is causing me weight gain. When I look at when I started it and when the weight gain started...they coincide with each other. THAT SUCKS. I've never had a med cause weight gain before. But even when I ate like a pig and shit, I never really went past a certain weight. But now I am and it sucks. I am finally starting to feel fat and of course that makes me a tad more depressed. Will explore this. And I have to remember to call the god damned fucking pdoc. I am frustrated because I keep forgetting!!! tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow.

And that's my thoughts now. It is interesting in this after life...before...people would have told me my brain was going to fast that I had to slooow down, everything had to be slowed. But now I celebrate that it goes fast and just learn how to manage it so that it stays positive and creative and not dark and self destructive. I make conscious choices to keep it that way. I feel more natural letting my brain go as fast as it wants. I even like and love it :-) And I am just glad I found a job where it is needed to be that way! Mad Pride!!!!

:-)
Erin