Well things are a bit better today.

I am going through a hard breakup right now. We were best freinds for like 9 months before we became more than that. And then she just freaked and emotionally withdrew hardcore and left me spinning. I freaked. I was ok before I met her, but now that I had attached to her, I really missed her when she was gone suddenly. And I didn't understand why, what I had done...she wouldn't talk to me at all about anything real. It was really tough. She was my only friend in a new city. And we both have similar pasts. It was tough to see her gone. And I still had to see her after. I had to see her again because she goes to school with me in a small program and we have to take classes together. I saw her yesterday. She said hi in a detatched tone like she didn't mean it at all but it was the polite thing to do. I said it the same way. It hurt. REALLY hurt. I wish I could tell her how much. But she doesn't want to know.  So I don't know. It is what it is. I am tired now. I have to work tommorow night so I should stay up tonight but I think I'll just sleep instead.