On April 29 I experienced something of a personal crisis and posted a status update on Facebook that caused one of my 'friends' to seriously overreact. The ensuing brouhaha at my home had to be seen to be believed. It was like something out of a bad movie. Certainly an eye-opening moment, albeit terrifying.

I fail to understand why it is that the modern concept of 'help' requires that the person being 'helped' be firmly under the 'helper's' thumb before things can proceed.

Following the April 29 Gestapo raid on my home in the name of 'help' I have been actively pondering this question. As that turned into a sleepless night I had no shortage of time to think about it.

Before setting out to 'help' another person in crisis, people really need to ask themselves these searching questions:

1. Are you really acting out of concern for the welfare of another, or are you merely wanting to play the hero in a crisis?

2. Are you prepared to maintain the utmost respect for the other person's wishes, rights and boundaries under these circumstances, or do you feel that power and control are necessary elements of 'helping'?

To my mind, unwanted 'help' is by definition a violent act. The closest equivalent would be rape. It is a fundamental violation of the person's body, mind or spirit which will inevitably have long-term negative consequences of unknown severity.

In this case, the safety and sanctity of the living space I've occupied largely without incident for twenty-one years has been shattered - perhaps irreparably. Knowing that the management with state backing can enter my dwelling space at will on the say-so of some third party (who doesn't even live on this site) when I've done nothing illegal both enrages and terrifies me. Right now I'm finding it very difficult to feel safe in my own home, even with the door securely locked.

Even when more than twelve hours had passed after the fact I was still shaking. At one point (from what I was told) there were as many as a dozen people crowded into my tiny apartment early that Wednesday evening including as many as eight armed, uniformed police officers. (What saved my butt was I had gone out for a half-hour or so and encountered this scenario upon my return, in time to take evasive measures).

Luckily, among the 'responders' were three of my friends from OCAP. This turned into one of the most powerful acts of solidarity I have ever experienced, enabling me to escape a potentially life-ruining situation essentially unscathed. Love and respect, folks - you know who you are! 

I'm wondering just how hard I might have to push back if it comes to it or if it might be more worthwhile simply abandoning ship and seeking new accommodations. Right now I'm more pissed off than anything else but that may change - I'm also bloody exhausted. What can actually be salvaged from this mess remains unknown.

As it turned out, in this situation I was lucky. Far too many people have been far less fortunate in similar situations. Proponents of 'community crisis teams' or those who feel it is appropriate to respond to someone's personal crises by calling the cops need to seriously re-think their strategies.