wow, this is the third time my blog entry has been deleted over the last three weeks.

so. i'm not going to re-write the entire thing.

but the point of it is that i have ZERO faith in mainstream medicine anymore. and i'm at the point where i feel like i should tell people to be afraid and skeptical of what is happening to them as well. i just think that i would have been better if i had never been on meds at all. really. someone should have told me to start running and stop smoking weed, and i think i could have dealt with the rest of the bipolar thing without meds.

now i'm super fat, thank you psych drugs, and have no energy, thank you lamictal, and am chronically sleepy. yay.

part of this is my fault. but someone should have listened to me when i said that i wanted off the big pharma monster. instead of listening to me, they all just decided that i didn't know what i was talking about, that i was bipolar, and needed to be medded.

i'm pissed!!!!

and also, i'm resentful of the years i have lost to these meds, and the crap i have put myself through to make sure i had health insurance, and make sure i would get my meds.

so here's to the hope that in three months the med monster will be dead, and i can find out who i really am and what i really look like.

so, i have a bad headache because the stupid meds are making my head hurt. my body wants the meds back and my heart wants to let them go.

away with you, be gone!!!!!!!!!!!!