ok. not sure if i did the first blog right.

dealing with effexor withdrawl right now. \could be worse without the herbal crap im on.

dealing with the me and the other me.

get lost in between them. forget things, makeup things. doubt my friends, lovers. doubt myself. have a hard time to see that i am amazing taht i can be loved and have so much to give and that im not the only one who sees that. want more cuddle friends. looking to deep into my nonboyfriend. scares me shitless to love him so much. neeed to spread that need around.

wolf lady died last week. can feel her beside me. always will. grateful for her life.

want to love myself before i love others. want to have faith that these relationships arent nessecary for me to be ok, sane, loved, safe. but it is. need another person to need me not just take care of me. makes me want to drive of the edge of the island cos no one can promise forever. and evenif they did  i would never believe them.

want to be loved lovde loved.

looking for lovers in the bc islands.