I have gone back to the old days of hiding behind fake names to be honest. Better his than the alternative. I guess. But I hate having to hide. To be ashamed. To be so powerless.

So here I am. Again and in many ways for the first time.

I have to wonder if any of this will matter. I wonder that a lot lately. I suppose none of you have the answers. No, I know you don't. In fact I am pretty sure there are no answers. No hope. Nothing but pain, murder, greed and finally death.

I wait for death because there is nothing left to look forward to. I sit idly by and wait. I am pathetic. I am dead already. I have lost everything.

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May you never be fighting for your life and at the same time have to fight  for your name.