As I started climbing the mountain, the shadows of the tall cedars blocked out most of the light; so there was considerably less bush, and more ferns and mosses. The trail was more visible and I started to make relatively good time. 
It took me a long time before a twinge of fear settled into my guts as I got further and further from humankind. At the same time, it appeared to me I was being tricked and I would never reach the end of the hike. The mountain seemed to be growing as I climbed, I just knew it was. I would see a plateau up ahead and would get a tingle of excitement that I was near the top, but when reached the plateau, there was just more mountain. It was an endless journey and the trail had started to spread off into different directions, probably due to the local animals. Some of the trees were marked with surveyors tape, the only signs of human life. The tape obviously marked off the main trail so I followed it continuously upward. Further, forever, endless trees... 
It started to get dark and I was in a state where there was no way I could turn back. I became more and more fearful of running out of light before reaching the top. I watched the odd fallen tree, planning my strategy for shelter from the light rain. Another plateau became obvious just ahead of me and I vowed if it was not the top, I would stop and find shelter. 
It was the top. 
I was really expecting some medicine man to be up there, telling me he had been waiting for me and asking why it took me so long. I really thought there would be, and the two people I mentioned, the ones I met along the way, they acted as if they shared in some sort of secret. It was almost as if they had been expecting me, waiting for me, waiting for the one... Like for a hundred thousand years the story of my arrival had been passed down.  It was like the stars were lined up, and I was carried away in some preordained flow that would bring me into a simple form of enlightenment. 
As I was climbing the mountain, it spoke to me about strength and stamina, about how to release my burdens of materialistic things, and the importance of that act. It spoke of how I was strong and wise following the guidance of the mysterious universe. The mountain spoke, and the branches of the bushes had caressed my journey, bending not breaking as I passed along the trail to see my destiny. 
I thought for sure there would be a person of Great Spirit sitting at the top of the mountain telepathically communicating my journey, like a guiding light. I felt betrayed by my own feelings, and vowed that I could not depend on the emotions I carry through any given situation.   
The mountain went up a bit more from there, but the clearing where I finally stood was my goal. The clearing was surrounded by trees on three sides; the fourth side dropped off into a cliff that overlooked Lemmens Inlet. Lemmens Inlet is the body of water that Meares Island wraps itself around. All I could see were murky inky clouds huddled at my feet. 
My heart sunk to a miserable low as I pondered why on earth I felt today of all days was the time to go up there. 
Why did I climb a mountain on my own, up on such a dreary, miserable day? Oh yes, because I had been promised by something in my head that I would find answers here, that someone would be here to meet me with a warming fire!! 
I felt betrayed; felt that I should have waited for a beautiful day! I opted for a place to lie down and get out of the rain; I was so incredibly tired and downcast.
I would have liked to sit out all the elements in the clearing, overlooking the beauty that lie beyond the reaches of the cliff, and await my vision; but instead I trudged back into the dark recess of the forest and found a fallen cedar for shelter. 
I stripped dead branches from off of the fallen tree, and layered them over the trunk as a roof.  Then I stripped big hunks of the dried bark off carefully, and placed it over the branches.  I would be somewhat sheltered from the elements, with this lean-to roof. 
It was when I was pulling moss for somewhere to lay my head, that I was jolted into a communication with something... Nothing, and everything
It was the moss; no it was something far smaller than the moss
The atoms of the moss 
No, it was and is something far larger 
It was the forest it was oxygen and water
The earth the stars 
It was the very basis of existence: energy and atoms
Life and nothingness
It was the thread in which everything is connected
I was shown how every living thing in the universe shares within each other the energies and relationships of matter to maintain one another’s balance and how one thing would be in jeopardy without the help of another, there was a supporting network in which the conglomeration of all matter breathes and lives as a single unit.  One thing cannot exist without the other.  I felt consumed by life as I became an integral part the earth, a living breathing mass, the host of billions of microscopic beings. 
I saw the spiritualization of matter, and all the energies that radiated off of all that was in existence. 
I was energy, we are energy. 
I could see all that is unseen, more life than we could possibly conceptualize.  I could see that within the soil I held in my two cupped hands there were more living creatures than there were people in the world.
I observed manifestations through the awareness of the ultimate underlying base of the source of all life; The Way.
There is a flow of energy that is circulating in all things, and in this energy I journeyed; throughthe connecting force that combines all matter into one entity... Earth.  I saw that through this way of energy flow, we are all one unit; our roots are spreading everywhere, and encompass the symbiotic harmony of all matter. 
There was the feeling of the immense vastness of space, indescribable infinity.  Infinity expanded outwards in all directions and dimensions and time and space.  8  . 
 
To make infinity a little clear to you, I have produced this ‘image’ through numbers.  Try to imagine...  The earth orbits the sun at 67,000mph, taking 365 days to travel around the sun once.  67,000mph X (365daysX24hrs) = 67,000mph X 8,760hrs yearly = a 586,920,000 mile path around the sun.   That’s some major travelling, some major gravitational forces keeping everything perfect.  Earth is 93,000,000 miles from the sun.  The sun is one of one billion suns.  A billion stars?  That’s it?  No, a billion atoms fill a period at the end of a sentence, so in this image the billion stars are akin to the size of a billion atoms, the size of a period.  Now how many periods does it take to fill all matter in the known universe?  Now that number that we get, which is currently too large to comprehend, fits into the size of an atom and a billion atoms fit into something the size of a period.  Now how many periods fit into the incomprehensible amount of atoms of a billion periods in nature?     
Our bodies are made up of matter, and matter makes up everything.  There is no separation from one thing and the next.  Matter is made up by atoms, and atoms are empty of much of anything but energy.  Matter is energy is consciousness...
I was standing back in the dream world that I seek daily, and this time it explained itself to me.   I embraced the trunk of a tree and co mingled our energies and elements, earth, water, air, and become one.  We shared the simpleness of all that is.  The tree shared unknown truths with me, and timeless histories of perceptions.
The history of life is progressive; and it is certainly not predictable. The earth's creatures have evolved through a series of events that result through unknown circumstances.  Like polarity:  negative and negative bounce apart but negative and positive comes together. 
The tiniest form of matter is the written workings of all that is.  The smallest elements are all that is.  An atom is made up of empty space, protons, neutrons and electrons.  The protons and neutrons cluster together in the center of the atom while the electrons wiz around this ‘nucleus’ at the speed of light, which is 186,000 miles per second.  Or 669,600,000 miles per hour.  That is the energy I try to describe here, what it is to see and know this energy.
Time, the vastness of time is really just one moment flowing into the next, it is all one and can all be remembered.  The spirit, the essence of energies never dies, as long as atoms hold things together, we will never be separated from the earth, even at death. 
Death is losing one form of physical structure, and entering into another.  Through the history of time I had been most everything.  I was told to think beyond the restraints of the physical hold I was in, and remember all the forms I had taken.  In this way, I will learn to respect all things.
 

The tree provided me with shelter and showed me that in death she was now the home to a plethora of mosses and lichens, insects and microscopic organisms. I felt so much life from those creatures alone, their significance, and their existence. It took so much out of me, like the earth grabbed hold of my consciousness and downloaded centuries of life into my head