I think I just earned some honesy points.  I just told my father that I had anxiety problems.  Some back info there is this block of ice that has existed between my father and I that I've

Fire in the hole

Fuck the Roman Calender!

I've made all these blogs about how bad my situation is, blowing off steam, being honest. I rarely take time to think about how much better I feel today than I did, say three years ago. At the time I was just out of a nervous breakdown, it hurt to eat and sleep and do just about anything, my mind was a tornado of bad karma, prosecuting and invasive thoughts. I was lost. Deep down part of me thought I was going to die. I though my balance had been destroyed forever.

Anyways I always manage to pick myself up, I should have gratitude where I carry this pesimissm. I don't have to like everything in the world, but I wish I could at least appreciate my own efforts. Thinking about mental health organizing and revolution lightens my mood, if anybody feels like talking to me about any of that, send me a message. There's a Cincinnati Bipolar and Depression Group that I'm going to attend in the middle of June and I am excited about that, I want to have something really groundbreaking and new to say to everyone there.

The winter was cold and I was 21 when I had my nervous breakdown. I debated about calling it a nervous breakdown for sometime, personally I felt like I had died. But the truth is I never did die, I was simply in a lot of pain. I made the decision to start calling it a nervous breakdown so that I could relate it to something in the outside world, and this way it would no longer be something that only existed inside of me.