and then i woke up.  so now what?

(and then, various ramblings about events since waking up, and asking: what now)

its hard for me to look into the eyes of my partner when expressing complicated emotions because i dont want him to see how awful i feel, about myself or whatever it is that i am expressing to him. i honestly feel and believe that if i was more attractive, my pleasure in our love making, would be more of a priority for him. my thoughts drift to my disconnect with mass media and societal acceptances. me or please me?

 Ten years of hearing the Mother Goddess Hekate has lead me to understand that Judaism and Christianity are the primary cause of child abuse in western society

.....you'll hear the 'under-lingo' and you'll diagnose the person next to you right away!

system system system

After a long day at work...I try really hard, not to be sexist and racist, in the face of sexism and racism. Oh how our eyes judge! ...but every human bleeds... and that color is nearly the same shade of red.